The evil genius who came up with Tinder must be having a pretty good time right now. Just kicking back, feeling responsible for a whole lot of extra love in the world and, let’s not forget, many, many people experiencing disastrous moments that are really only good for drunkenly relaying to friends.
Since actually meeting people out and about is redundant these days (Netflix at home with the dog for the win), it seems Tinder will be sticking around. In celebration of that, we’ve written a list of local spots to go on your very first Tinder date with someone you know from six profile photos and one short sentence.
Keeping in mind we’re the people with the Netflix and the dog.
Burleigh Hill on a Sunday afternoon
First of all, instead of Tinder, you could probably meet someone in the flesh there if you’re brave, but we digress. Obviously Burleigh Hill is a pretty little spot for a date, throw in some cheese and some wine and you’re set. HOWEVER, should the date not be going well, that place is absolutely packed with people wearing outrageous party shirts and throwing various sporting goods around so all you need to do is say you’re going to the bathroom and disappear into the crowd, never to be seen again. You’re welcome.
Any sushi place
Sushi is delicious, don’t deny it. There is something to delight every tastebud and that’s always handy when you’re going on a date with someone you don’t know in any way. Again, if things aren’t going well (look we’re developing a pattern) it is actually possible to shove at least three pieces of sushi in your mouth at once to a. avoid any possible hope of conversation and b. finish your food and bail, saying you don’t feel the best. Because you probably don’t and for good reason.
Live music venues
Any person who doesn’t love live music is probably not a person you want to date anyway (in our opinion) and there are very few date stories that begin with “we went to a gig and had a really bad time” correct? So there’s that. There’s also darkness (you know what we’re saying), loudness (in case the chat is lacking) and bulk drinking opportunities. Plus, there is never a dull moment on the dance floor and if you end up getting married, you’ll have quite the first date story to tell the grandkids.
Market-style food venues
So much opportunity for chats about food. Who doesn’t love chats about food? Yes, this could be why we’re the Netflix and dog people but we also bring a lot of quality thoughts to food chats so what are you gonna do. ANYWAY. Roaming around deciding what you’re going to eat when there are options galore is one of life’s’ greatest pleasures. Not to mention you can discuss said options with your date in case there is a lack of any other conversation of substance. Also, you can eat so much you get really full and sleepy and have to go home if, of course, things aren’t going well.
Not really a revelation obviously but here we are. It’s highly unlikely you’re not going to have a good time at a theme park because fairy floss, hot chips and indulging your inner child are always a good time. Maybe we eat too much on dates come to think of it. So theme parks. They’re fun, you can go for any amount of time you like and if things ARE going well (see, we’re positive too) you can grab old mate/loves’ hand at the top of the rollercoaster and awkward first touch weirdness is avoided by terrifying rollercoaster times. If things aren’t going well, you’re stuck way up north with a person whose hand you just grabbed and we have absolutely nothing for that. Soz.
Go forth and get it.
Words by Kirra Smith